Let’s Go Somewhere Quiet – why the name?

 
Calling an album “Let’s Go Somewhere Quiet” isn’t the most obvious thing to do. So why? Because they’re the most frightening words I can hear. Even now, they make my heart leap, stomach sink and adrenaline race. Because that’s what doctors say when they are giving you really bad news. Not just ordinary bad. But weepie movie bad.
 
Reminds me of something I wrote back in April 2007, after we heard that the tumour was back and there were no more options. We had less than six months left, though we didn’t know it then:
 
I guess there’s no good way to get bad news. But there’s a curious ritualistic quality to it that gets repeated over and over again, irrespective of the hospital.
1. The consultant comes in with serious face asking whether we can “go somewhere quiet”. These have become the most frightening words I can hear.
2. We go with the consultant and a nurse feeling sick and very small, like children on the first day at a new school.
3. We go to a small room, bare except for a few chairs, a few cheap prints on the wall and an ominous box of tissues.
4. We sit on the chairs furthest from the door. Never sure whether this is so they can exit gracefully or to stop us running, screaming from the room.
5. The consultants always start the same way “I’m sorry to have to give you this news but…”. Then you get the news. They pause, then give you the news again in a different way in case you blocked it out the first time.
6. They offer tissues and ask if you have any questions. You don’t really have any since you are reeling but ask a few anyway, since they’ve asked. You won’t remember the answers later.
7. They ask if “you’d like a few moments alone” and withdraw.
8. The next half an hour passes in a blur. In our case, the wife talks non-stop inbetween the tears. I struggle to make sense of what she’s saying but try to mumble a few things appropriately.
9. Then I go back to the boy and the wife goes to ring her family.
10. Finally, the nurses leave us all alone for a few hours. If you don’t refer to the news none of the nurses will.

This feels suitable accompaniment.

Lamb – Gorecki

http://ependyparent.blogspot.co.uk/

http://braintumourtrust.co.uk/helping-us/donate/

http://www.facebook.com/SomewhereQuiet

~ by acidted on May 23, 2012.

One Response to “Let’s Go Somewhere Quiet – why the name?”

  1. Frighteningly accurate account of how this happens.

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